Chapter 4: Don't Be Afraid, Mommy Is Here

She had finally returned, and she would live this life well. She would be very careful to protect everything before her; otherwise, she feared another collapse into a situation beyond her control.

“Liangliang, this is for you.”

Zhou Lanping fumbled around her person for a long time before finally pulling out some money. She placed it in front of Liu Liang.

“When you’ve spent it, tell Mom.”

Zhou Lanping smiled, appearing not to feel the pinch of the money at all. Yet, anyone could see how desperately she needed it. The clothes she wore had been washed until they were faded, and even the sleeves had been mended.

Liu Liang lowered her head, staring somewhat blankly at the money on the table. In the nineties, a monthly salary was only three or four hundred yuan. Zhou Lanping was a second-grade elementary school teacher, and at that time, the salary for an elementary teacher was even lower—only three hundred and twenty yuan.

She took the money and counted it. There was fifty yuan. Fifty yuan could be considered the monthly living expenses for an ordinary family.

Liu Liang suddenly thought of something. She retrieved her schoolbag from the floor, rummaged through it for a long time, and finally pulled out a handful of money from a small pocket.

Because the memories were so distant, she had forgotten some things. She remembered that when she had just returned from the Xu family, her mother had given her the majority of her salary. How had she spent it back then? She had forgotten. She only remembered that this was perhaps the most self-indulgent and carefree time of her entire life.

She wanted whatever she saw. If others had it, she had to have it; if others didn't have it, she still had to have it. She spent money lavishly, never realizing how difficult it was for Zhou Lanping, an ordinary elementary school teacher with a salary of only three hundred yuan a month, to support herself while also raising a daughter who spent money like water.

She grabbed the money and stuffed it right back into her schoolbag.

Then, she picked up the bag and walked into her room. Her mother lived in the small room, while she lived in the large one. Now, she truly felt that Zhou Lanping wasn't raising a daughter, but an ancestor—one that would devour people without even spitting out the bones.

Neither she, nor the one before her, had ever treated her mother well. They say children are the enemies of their parents from a past life. She thought that in her past life, she must have been her mother’s greatest enemy. Otherwise, how could she have done such vicious things to her own biological mother, and in the end, even force her mother onto the path of suicide just to let her live a few more days?

She placed her hands on her head. The memories of two lifetimes were tangled in her mind, making her head feel as if it had been forcibly stuffed with a pile of things, about to burst.

Throwing her schoolbag onto the floor, she threw herself onto the wooden bed. Outside, there was the unique atmosphere of this era—no traffic jams everywhere, no smog that appeared in every city during the winter. The air at this time was still fresh, and people were actually very easily satisfied.

She didn't even cover herself with a quilt. As she closed her eyes, those memories mixed with her past flowed like water, rushing into her mind like madness.

This was the deepest, cruelest, most wounding, and most painful part of her memory.

A young girl carrying her schoolbag walked into a magnificent house. Having lived in a tenement building where several people shared one small room and dozens shared one toilet, she knew what heaven was, and to her, this place was heaven.

“Although you have no relation to our family, you can be considered as having been raised by us.”

The noblewoman lifted her eyelids to glance coldly at the girl dressed in shabby clothes. “Your mother is truly incompetent. In just a few days, she has raised you to be so small-minded.”

The girl just stood there, fawning and awkward.

“It’s not impossible for you to come back,” the woman snorted, her tone like she was bestowing charity.

“If you want to come back, you can. You are still a member of our Xu family. But our Xu family cannot raise you for nothing. You must do the cleaning, laundry, and cooking in this house. After all, if it weren't for you and your mother, my Jiajia wouldn't have suffered for twelve years.”

The girl gripped her schoolbag tightly, but in the end, she nodded. To return to a place that wasn't her home, she sacrificed her dignity and ruined her heart.

Afterward, in this place that looked like a palace, she slept in the most remote utility room. It had no windows, only a dilapidated wooden bed. She woke up before five every day to clean the house, buy groceries, and cook, never stopping. On the outside, she looked polished, but on the inside, what was she?

Time was like a shattered mirror, each piece a day of her humbleness. She wore a smile for others and held her chin high for her classmates. She lived like a parasite in this wealthy household, wasting her youth and her life. She had never enjoyed life or loved her own existence, until she fell ill. She was thrown out like trash. It was her mother who picked her up, fed her, clothed her, and treated her illness, giving her all the money she had saved.

Mom said that it was meant for her anyway; no matter how bad she was, she was Mom’s treasure.

That woman used her thin, weak shoulders to support a broken home and a daughter who never listened and ruined herself.

But no matter what others said, she treated her daughter as a treasure.

They said, “Don’t save her, she can’t be saved.”

They said, “She doesn’t even recognize you and looks down on you for being poor. Why are you still trying to save her?”

They said, “She is an ingrate. Even if she lives, she will just go back to looking for rich people.”

But that foolish woman remained steadfast, selling everything that could be sold, borrowing all the money that could be borrowed. In the end, she even hid from people she knew when she saw them.

A door opened, and a gaunt woman walked in. She went to the hospital bed and held a hand that looked like a chicken claw.

Even though she was so thin and dark, she still wore a warm smile on her face. Just like her hands, it was warm, gentle, encompassing everything, and soothing everything.

“Don’t be afraid, Mom will save you.”

Yet, who could see the slight trembling of her shoulders as she smiled?

Save her? How could she save her? Penniless, they couldn't even afford a bowl of rice.

The woman raised her hand, gently stroking her daughter’s unrecognizable face. “Don’t be afraid, you still have Mom.”

The thing she said most often was this: “Don’t be afraid, Mom is here. Don’t be afraid, Mom is here.”

That night, the wind was strong, and it was raining heavily. The gaunt woman stood in the wind and rain. She lifted her face, and the yellow light under the streetlamp made the pallor of her face even more striking. Beneath the wrinkles was a face so thin it had lost its shape.

Car after car sped through the wind and rain. Suddenly, she ran toward a car.

Then, she was hit hard and thrown, falling heavily to the ground. The rain lashed at her face, but strangely, her expression was peaceful.

The corners of her lips moved slightly.

It seemed to be that same sentence.

“Don’t be afraid, Mom is here…”

(End of chapter)