Chapter 45: Shame

Warm tears rolled down, quickly soaking a large patch of Lu Nanting's shirt.

Feeling heartache, Lu Nanting stroked the back of her head and picked her up directly, as if cradling a child.

Gu Lanxi immediately lowered her head, resting it against his broad shoulder. Her tears continued to flow, soon wetting his shoulder as well.

Auntie Wang had finished breakfast and was tidying up the living room.

Knowing she was sensitive about her dignity, Lu Nanting stroked her back gently, step by step, as he carried her into the bedroom. He kicked the door shut behind them and sat down on the soft spring stool at the foot of the bed.

True to a name filled with so much "water," Gu Lanxi was always like this when she cried—quiet, yet capable of soaking half his clothes at a moment's notice.

She had no one to rely on during her upbringing, so she had learned to be strong and to pretend. But Lu Nanting knew she wasn't as cold as she appeared.

She possessed rich emotions; she simply didn't want others to see them.

She felt every bit of kindness, and every bit of unkindness, directed toward her.

She had simply grown accustomed to restraining herself, refusing to respond casually for fear of being perceived as overthinking or being overly sentimental.

Lu Nanting continued to stroke her back until she had vented enough. Only when she shyly covered her eyes did he ask her

"What exactly happened? Can you tell me about it?"

Having lacked guidance from female elders, Gu Lanxi had experienced intense menstrual shame in her younger years, and naturally, her sexual shame was equally strong.

The first time she had her period was at school; the blood had seeped through her green school uniform trousers, leaving a large stain on her chair.

Everyone had looked at her with strange eyes, as if she were some kind of monster, and at the time, she hadn't even understood what was happening.

Her reputation had been quite poor during those two years. Her classmates had been strictly warned by their parents not to play with her. She was busy struggling for survival every day and had no time to make friends, so that day, no one had walked up to her to say even a single word of support.

She still couldn't forget that feeling of standing naked in a crowd.

She never expected that after all these years, she would still experience that sense of despair.

Something far more private than menstruation—something that made her blush just thinking about it—was being brought up and discussed online. It wasn't even the truth; it was just something fabricated by strangers.

Perhaps netizens thought she was just "cute," but to her, it was an extremely invasive offense that lacked any sense of boundaries.

"I... I can't say it..."

Gu Lanxi sat on his lap, her arms wrapped around his neck, her head resting on his shoulder, refusing to let go.

"You believe me, right?"

"Yes."

"You've seen me at my most embarrassing moments too, right?"

Lu Nanting had also had his own breakdowns in the past; his tall, 1.8-meter frame had once collapsed against her, crying until he was breathless.

That was true.

Gu Lanxi nodded again.

"I promise, no matter what it is, I won't laugh at you, okay?"

After a long hesitation, Gu Lanxi whispered, "Someone said I'm asexual, that I look like a monk who has attained spiritual purity."

Lu Nanting had been feeling heavy-hearted from reading Weibo lately, but he had been too tired last night to check. When he woke up this morning, remembering how Gu Lanxi had proactively kissed him, he felt an inexhaustible surge of energy and went straight to the gym, so he truly hadn't known about this.

"That's just because they have poor judgment. Don't take it to heart."

"And someone else mocked me, taking my embarrassing stories and turning them into jokes."

As a top student, the thing she could tolerate least was when others understood something that she didn't.

"Oh? People who mock others at random aren't good people. Don't bother with bad people; you'll never win an argument with them."

Gu Lanxi cried out of sheer frustration, feeling as though her heart was suffocating.

Once comforted, she opened the floodgates

"The year we filmed *Spring Day*, an actress lived next door to me. The soundproofing in that small-town budget hotel was terrible. One night, I heard her screaming incessantly in the next room, shouting, 'Help! Help! Ahhh! Spare me!'... I thought she was in danger, so I called the police."

She had originally wanted to go save her herself, but she didn't know how many bad guys there were, so she didn't dare take the risk.

"And then?"

Since they had been together, Lu Nanting had realized she was still quite naive; even a simple kiss on the forehead could make her blush for a long time.

He hadn't expected her to still be such a "clueless sweetheart."

Lu Nanting suppressed a laugh, though his voice carried a hint of amusement.

"Later I found out that the actress's scenes were almost finished, and she was trying to please a chubby assistant casting director to get a better role. It was... it was 'casting couch' stuff..."

Gu Lanxi had sharp ears and keen observation skills; she had stumbled upon similar things quite often over the years.

She just didn't know that some actors could take their acting all the way to the bedroom.

And she couldn't understand how old men could have such strange egos.

It wasn't like they were serial killers; why would they get so worked up hearing those things?

What was most infuriating was that while everyone seemed too embarrassed to say such things out loud, they loved to talk about them in riddles, making it easy to miss the point if you weren't paying attention.

It was so annoying!

"Don't associate with such improper people in the future. Since their hearts aren't on the right path, we'll despise them together!"

"Of course!"

"And then?"

"Then things blew up. The assistant director's wife came to the set and scratched his face up so badly it looked like a flower garden, and the news spread."

To the point where people still remembered it and brought it up online.

"They were clearly the ones who did something wrong, yet I'm the one being mocked. It's so unfair."

Lu Nanting was a normal man; he could understand why people found it funny, but he obviously couldn't say so.

Gu Lanxi couldn't see his expression, so she continued to complain indignantly

"And then there was that Tuesday. Didn't I tell you I recorded a program? That host loves to dig for drama. She said something that I didn't understand, and then I was mocked for it."

"What did she say?"

"She said there was a girl who gave her ex-boyfriend an umbrella when they broke up. Everyone else started laughing, but I didn't know what they were laughing at. The host felt awkward and changed the subject. At the time, I just thought what she said was nonsensical. Then, when the program aired, that segment was edited out, and I didn't think much of it. I didn't expect people to use it as 'evidence' to prove I've never... done *that*... as if everyone who has done those things can automatically understand what she was talking about! As if they have some kind of superiority!"

Gu Lanxi was truly livid. Usually a woman of few words, today she was like a machine gun, her little mouth chattering incessantly.

Lu Nanting was in immense pain trying to hold back his laughter, but fearing domestic violence, he didn't dare utter a word.

"Why aren't you saying anything?"

Sensing something was wrong, Gu Lanxi looked up at him. Seeing his face contorted from the effort of suppressing a laugh, she felt as if a bucket of cold water had been poured over her.

"You think I'm ridiculous too? You're laughing at me with them??"

Seeing her eyes redden again, her face filled with confusion—was the world broken, or was she?

Lu Nanting felt a bit lost and hurriedly explained

"It's a joke. Giving an ex-boyfriend an umbrella with a note that says, 'If you are impotent, then it is a sunny day.' When the host mentioned it, she was probably trying to make a joke with you, hoping that while you were laughing, she could ask what you would give an ex-boyfriend to find out your relationship status."

As the great mystery was solved, Gu Lanxi frowned

"In such a serious program, I thought she was a serious host. Why couldn't she just ask directly?"

"The problem is, you can't ask that question directly!"

Gu Lanxi was exasperated: "Does she think she's being humorous?"

Lu Nanting nodded. "Probably."

Not just the host, but most people treated it as a funny joke, rather than something vulgar or unspeakable.

Gu Lanxi fell silent. She let go of him, intending to ignore him.

Knowing she was unhappy, Lu Nanting quickly hugged her and tried his best to coax her

"Don't be angry. It's just that you prefer to focus your energy on more important things, so you don't pay attention to this kind of stuff. It's normal not to understand; I don't understand much either. In the future, we can learn together, progress together, and make up for our lack of knowledge together. We don't have to rush; we can start practicing with kissing..."

Gu Lanxi didn't say a word; she simply jumped out of his arms and gave him a fierce glare!

"Hey, tell me, if we have a daughter in the future and she suffers grievances outside, will she be like you—clinging to my neck and complaining all tearfully?"

Seeing his look of longing, Gu Lanxi was enraged! She pushed him straight out the door!

But as soon as she slammed the door, she couldn't help but fantasize along with him—if they really had a daughter, what would she look like?

As for that nonsense on the internet, it suddenly seemed much less important.

After all, she was still two months away from turning twenty-two.

She was just a young girl who felt hurt and would cry in private.

Come to think of it, having someone in this world she could trust wholeheartedly was actually a very happy thing.

When it came to coaxing his wife, the top star was quite a professional.

(End of Chapter)