Chapter 36: Remembering the Past

Gu Qingyun laughed heartily, "Hahaha, you little girl, your tongue is as sweet as honey. How could your uncle possibly blame you? I just heard you telling your grandfather that you want a maidservant skilled in martial arts? And you want to go to the Gu Family Army's training grounds?"

Lin Jinyan smiled and said, "I have always known of the Gu Family Army's illustrious reputation for protecting the country, and I feel very proud of it; I want to go and see. As for the maidservant—Uncle, aside from Yan'er, all the children of the Gu family possess martial skills. My brother is the same age as I and practices every day. You say that girls should not wield swords and spears, but surely it is acceptable to have a maidservant who knows martial arts?"

Gu Qingyun found it amusing. "Ruizhou and Yichen are destined for the battlefield, so they must study martial arts rigorously. Although An'er does not need to go to war, practicing martial arts to strengthen her body is beneficial, which is why your grandfather found a martial arts instructor for her to teach some easy techniques. But you are a young lady of a noble household; where would you find a use for martial arts?"

Lin Jinyan said with great seriousness, "I am a child of the Gu family in the General's Manor. How can I be like an ordinary weak woman, spending my entire life confined within the deep courtyards?"

The phrase "a child of the Gu family" left the members of the Gu family feeling immensely gratified.

The corners of Gu Hongzhang's mouth curled upward uncontrollably. "Is Yan'er preparing to follow the Gu Family Army into battle to kill enemies and become a female general?"

Lin Jinyan turned and walked up to Gu Hongzhang. "If Yan'er truly had the ability to be a general, what would stop me? It is just that I know I do not possess such capability. Therefore, I only ask that no matter the circumstances, I can protect myself. If I am safe, then Grandfather, Uncle, and Aunt can also be at peace."

Gu Hongzhang laughed. "Well said. Yan'er, you must remember these words: no matter what happens or what situation you find yourself in, you must protect yourself. I will handle everything else. As long as you and An'er are well, the Gu family will be fine."

As Lin Jinyan listened, her heart felt warm, yet she felt a dense wave of bitterness surrounding her. Her eyes began to redden once more.

"Grandfather... I know. I know that you, Uncle, and Aunt are willing to do anything for me and my brother."

Gu Hongzhang gently stroked Lin Jinyan's head, just as he used to stroke his young daughter, Gu Qinglan, when she was a child.

"When your mother was young, she was just as lovable as you are. I used to think that if she never found a man she loved when she grew up, your grandmother and I could just raise her for the rest of her life.

Later, she fell in love with the high-spirited top scholar of the time. Seeing her happy, we were glad to support it. Your father was a man of noble character; the Lin family had pure traditions, did not take concubines, and had a simple household. Moreover, he held no real power, so he wouldn't arouse the suspicion of the Imperial Family. I thought she would never suffer grievances there, and your grandmother and I could finally rest easy.

But who could have imagined... she wouldn't make it through childbirth... she actually drew her last breath right before my eyes... leaving us, the white-haired, to bury the black-haired. Your grandmother suffered from heart pains for many years; they were ailments caused by years of worrying about me, and your aunt had no way to cure them. Not long after your mother passed, your grandmother couldn't hold on either and followed her...

Before your mother left, she held my hand and begged me to make sure I looked after her two children. A few days ago when you fell into the water and I saw your tiny body lying there, I was truly terrified that something else might happen to you. My heart only settled once your aunt said you were unharmed.

I couldn't feel at ease with the Lin family, so I brought An'er back to the manor that very night. If your aunt hadn't said you needed quiet rest, I would have prepared to bring you back as well and never return to the Lin family."

Gu Hongzhang, who had been smiling, grew sorrowful by the end, his eyes turning slightly red.

He understood that the Lin family was not to blame, yet a sliver of resentment always lingered in his heart.

His only daughter had died giving birth to a child for the Lin family, and his granddaughter had almost met with an accident at the Lin house. How could he not feel resentment?

(End of Chapter)